Because I know that You love me.

I almost want to apologize because I talk about love so much, but then again, 1 Corinthians 13:13 kind of puts in to perspective how deeply important love is. Therefore, I will not apologize.

I read a blog post by a friend about a month ago, where she said that she's been having a lot of trouble loving people. I commented on her post saying that I've been having the same week she has.

Love is patient.
Love is kind.
Love does not envy.
Love does not boast.
Love is not proud.
Love does not dishonor others.
Love is not self-seeking.
Love is not easily angered.
Love keeps no records of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth.
Love always protects.
Love always trusts.
Love always hopes.
Love always perseveres.
Love never fails.

A few months ago I realized that this was a painting of God's love. Only God's love is perfect, and although we are supposed to love others with the love of God, our sin does not allow us to love without failure. We aren't always patients. We aren't always kind. We do envy, and oftentimes boast, even if only to ourselves. etc. etc. etc.

I have not been having the best semester of my life. I take responsibility for this.
Honestly, I have been looking at others and seeing where their love has holes. Where their love fails. I have deemed friends hypocritical because at times they are selfish, or proud, or boastful. Sometimes they are not kind.
I think that I have been bothered by this so much, because I am literally criticizing people for my own downfalls. When I look at someone, I more often dislike them for the qualities they have that are similar to my own downfalls that I have not addressed or asked forgiveness for.

To all my friends, family, and loved ones: I am sorry that I have not loved. So sorry.
I have not allowed the Holy Spirit to move through me. I have become stagnant, complaining that there are not any openings or opportunities, when in truth, I have becomes someone who is not ready for opportunities; I have not been truly readying myself for furthering the Kingdom of God.

The book Dateable addresses the fact that you need to be someone who someone else wants to marry. You can't just look for the perfect person and expect that you're perfect for them in return, especially when you have done nothing to grow.
This principle is one which is more broadly a definition of how we are to love others. We need to be prepared for what God has for us, not just expect that He will give us opportunities and THEN the strength to be successful in His Will.

Even when we don't know His Will, and right now I very much do NOT know certain aspects of His Will for me, faith has to reign. Trust that He does have a plan for our lives; hope in those plans.

We all fall short of the Glory of God. Sometimes the fall feels harder than others. Sometimes we do not even realize that we have fallen at all. But God's love for us never fails. And that is beautiful.