Possibilities of Love.

"If anyone wishes to come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me" (Luke 9:23).

In this verse, there is no room left for hesitation or second thoughts. It is unsettling to think about, and the demanding requirements of it are some of the main reasons why men and women hold themselves back from fully following Christ. 

It is important to recognize that most of the greatest strides of Faith from Christians, come from the times when they just TRUST God and do His Will, no questions asked.

Well... I think God has laid something on my heart (and it scares me to death).

First, let me start by saying that I have never felt called to serve as a missionary or to be the most... evangelical Christian ever. I see great benefits in mission trips and the like, but actually serving in a mission field as a "missionary" for an extended period of time has always been something that I assumed would never be my calling...... until now.

I still don't think I'm supposed to be a missionary, but there's a program that I found out about through a really good friend of mine (who did the program himself), which not only intrigues me but seems so... right.

The program? Mission Year.

This is a year long service project where Christian, Young Adults are placed in teams of 5 or 6, and live in a needy city from the beginning of September, to the beginning of the following August. They find different service projects throughout the city and become involved in the community, helping neighbors and showing everyone around them the love of Christ. The mission statement of Mission Year is "Love God / Love People // Nothing Else Matters". 

For awhile now I've felt static, like God wasn't doing anything with me. I've always had a passion for people, and, specifically in the past week, have been faced with the fact that I as a selfish human being, care much more about myself than about other people, and to be truthful, more than I care about God.

I know I am specifically called by God to Love Him by Loving others, and this project would be an extreme way of doing that. I would have to give up basically everything I have and put many aspects of my life on hold: school, relationships, and my job, just to name a few. This would be a radical way of living the already radical calling which we all have, (to deny ourselves and follow God's will instead), and I think it would be one of the most beneficial.

Stippick (my friend who served through Mission Year in New Orleans in 08-09) sat down with me last night and told me everything I could ever want to know about the program. He told me of the trials, of the stresses, of the arguments and of the hardships which he and his team mates faced... but he also told me of the joy it produced, the relationships which it forged, and of the understanding of God, Others, and Self which it brought forth. He said he would do it again in a heartbeat.

I don't know if this is EXACTLY what I'm supposed to do yet, but prayers of wisdom and understanding would be greatly appreciated. All I can do is pray about this: that God will show me the path He has for me, which will empower me in Him and strengthen both my faith, AND my ability to LOVE.